Showing posts with label advertising. Show all posts
Showing posts with label advertising. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Has anyone seen this TV ad for Five Hour Energy?



I’ve seen it a number of times.  It just has a lady in a pants suit sitting on a table next to a very tall stack of paper.  Her spiel, which I am paraphrasing, goes something like this.

"Have you asked your doctor about Five Hour Energy?  We did, and the results were AMAZING!  Fully 73% of doctors surveyed said that they would recommend a low calorie energy supplement to their patients who use energy supplements.  73%!"

There’s a bit more, but that’s the crux of this ad spot.

Gah, I can’t stand overt stupid in our society, and I hate it when advertisers just assume the viewers have the intellect of a persimmon.   I don’t suppose I need to point out to you, alert reader, about how inane this ad is.  The only thing that this “study” found out is that 73% (which actually isn’t that much to brag about) would prefer their patients, if they absolutely feel they must use an energy supplement, use a low calorie one rather than a fattening one.  Nothing about recommending an energy supplement in the first place, nothing at all about Five Hour Energy specifically….  When I asked my doctor once about one of those supplements for joint discomfort that has glucosamine and condrotin in it, he said something like, “Well, it can’t hurt you.”  That’s what doctors really think of dietary supplements for any reason.

I just find it fantastic, given how much money is involved in buying time on national TV for commercials, that this ad company expects a lot of potential customers to be convinced by this argument.  But perhaps, people really are swayed by someone who spouts a bunch of statistics that may sound impressive but are really out to manipulate the viewer.  Sort of like our current politicians.

Here’s someone else that finds Five Hour Energy ads to be stupid and potentially deceptive.

Ah, the wonders of the Free Market!


Yes, I know the free market is just like Darwinism, in that the weak and the fatally flawed quickly die out to be replaced by the stronger, but really....  Who thought this might be a good idea?

Friday, October 07, 2011

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Boy, I hate Christmas commercials on television.



When I was a kid, Christmas commercials used to be kind of cute or silly.... "Noelco! Even our name says Merry Christmas!" I am old enough that I still remember the stop animation Santa riding down the hill on a three headed shaver. But it seems that a vast majority of the commercials we see today are for two, very high-priced items: jewelry and automobiles. The ones for jewelry, I am sorry to admit, really kind of make me want to hurl. Ultra-romantic, everything just perfect. Oh, how your lady's eyes will glow with love and complete adoration when you give her this expensive bauble. Who in their right mind would go out into the woods or even in their own yard and put up literally thousands of Christmas lights just so they can give their wife/girlfriend a necklace? Cripes. Maybe I am just a total unromantic, but these things are so stupid in their overwhelming desire to make the watcher try to emulate the "Perfect Christmas Gift." Ugh.

And the ones for cars... It's now apparently expected that people will go out and buy expensive cars at Christmas. One commercial even had a wife surprising her hubby with a brand new car, and she somehow contrived to have the damn thing inside in the living room with all the Christmas decorations.

At a time when 10% of Americans are out of work and a larger percentage have either given up looking or are what we euphemistically referred to as "under-employed", it doesn't seem terribly appropriate to be rubbing the fact that there are still some people (the ones who want Bush tax cuts for the top 2%) who can buy this really unnecessary but terribly expensive crap.

Yeah, I know that I write a variation of this post every single Christmas... But that doesn't lessen my feelings any.

Bah-humbug.

Image from The Golem Universe.

Sunday, September 05, 2010

Unorganized, completely random non-political thoughts on a dreary, overcast Sunday morning.

- I think that all the television networks should just go ahead and get where they obviously want to go, which is to take over the lower third of the television screen and broadcast commercials 100% of the time, even while the main programming is ongoing. They are almost there anyway. They might as well go ahead and go that last mile right now and get it over with. Hey, they could even run commercials DURING commercials! Just think of the additional revenue!

- Why does the Sci-Fi Channel (excuse me, SyFy) show professional wrestling? Does anyone actually watch those Ghost Hunter shows where all I can see happening on the previews is a bunch of people filmed with night vision equipment whispering to each other and yelling “What was that?!?” Why does the Arts and Entertainment Channel show absolutely nothing related to the arts, or even entertainment? Why doesn’t the History Channel show any history? Why is there a goddam reality show on every single specialty channel on television?

- Airlines are now charging 40 bucks if you would like “UP TO six more inches of legroom”, a chance to get in line early and if you want to pay more money to earn more frequent flyer miles so you can subject yourself to more of the same torture you are currently going through sometime in the near future.

- My computer keeps asking me if I want to download a new version of this or that, such as iTunes or my e-mail, without telling me what the new version is going to do for me or any existing problems that I might currently have that this new software will fix. Why would I want to install something that I don’t even know what it does for me and the current version works fine? Is our society now so spring loaded to accept anything new related to electronics or software that we don’t even ask WHY first?

- Do the voice actors and actresses that do English dubbing of Japanese anime feel stupid or foolish when they are making those really stupid, squeaky voices? The overbearing, highly authoritative and/or menacing voices sound pretty silly, too.

- Speaking of feeling silly, did Jimmy Johnson of NFL and NASCAR fame feel ridiculous when he was filming those commercials for Extendz, those “penis-enhancing” pills with that young, really nice looking female “reporter?” Because if I were to try something like that, I believe I would have died of embarrassment right there, on the spot.

- Except for people who own stock in the huge corporations that own movie studios, why does anyone care how much money a movie earned on any given weekend? Is this any indication, at all, about how good a movie this might be? Whatever happened to critical reviews as an indicator of the worth of any particular film. Money? That’s all it’s about, even for the audiences? “Ooohh! Iron Man 2 earned eighty trillion dollars this week! I have to go see that one!”

- Players fighting during a baseball game garners the participants a fine and a suspension. Players fighting during a hockey game earns them five minutes in the “penalty box.” Football players will do almost anything rather than admit they are hurt. They will continue to play through all sorts of pain and blood. Soccer players (the OTHER football players) will scream, collapse on the field (sorry, pitch) and writhe around for minutes, sometimes requiring people to come out and carry them off with a stretcher, all because they got bumped or clipped by a player on the opposing team. Universities pay millions of dollars for coaches’ salaries and for upgrades to stadiums, which mostly include luxury boxes for those wealthy corporate interests. Those same universities get millions of dollars from television contracts, wealthy donors and requiring “donations” for those sports minded individuals who would like season tickets. Yet, the players get absolutely nothing other than a chance at a mostly free education. Cities, communities and states build huge, lavish sports arenas and stadiums with all or mostly all public funds, all to benefit obscenely rich team owners. I have no real observation here, other than to say, not only are Americans way too into sporting events, we aren’t even consistent. But then, we apparently don’t care. Go team! Rah!

- eBay really sucks. I refuse to use Paypal, but they now require it. Why? Because they can make more money, as they just happen to own Paypal. What a surprise. Is there anything in this country anymore that isn’t driven by the desire to extort the maximum amount of money from the general public as humanly possible?

- And finally, a bit about the Hardy Boys. You know, those brilliant kids who solved every sort of mystery that came their way and apparently stayed in high school for about 45 years? Those books were one thing that really got me through childhood and also taught me that reading was enjoyable. I know that the target audience of those books were, shall we say, less than critical. But really... Frank and Joe were not all that brilliant. They were extremely lucky. “Clues”, as they called them, just fell into their laps. They happened to be walking along and hear a conversation that just happened to relate to the case their famous dad was working on. They just happened to find a notebook with everything that the criminal they were chasing had every written down or thought of. Everything that happened to them was related. And their parents! What terrible parents! Sure, let them go out at all hours of the night and end up getting tied up or shot at by desperate criminals. Sure, go explore some abandoned mines in the hope you might find some gold that has been missing for 40 years. Just be careful, don’t get caught in any mine collapses and be sure to be home for dinner. Sheesh.

Saturday, May 08, 2010

Hybrids and electric cars are not “green.”

I find myself very annoyed at television commercials about these so-called “green” automobiles that show all sorts of flower, trees and animals, thus implying that these things are actually great for the environment. Hey, they aren’t, O.K.?

What the companies that make these vehicles are implying is that it is a matter of degrees. Nothing that contributes pollution to the environment is good for the environment. It is just “less bad” than the alternatives, and even that may be a red herring. I maintain that "less bad than the alternative" is not really "being green." And, when the big picture is considered, even being "less bad" is something that really hasn't been proven yet.

What is not being considered about electric cars that need to be recharged fairly often is that this electricity must come from somewhere. It must be generated, and the overwhelming source of electrical power in this country is from coal-fired power plants. Burning coal on a large scale is not and never will be “green.” If everyone were to stop driving vehicles that burn gasoline, that would indeed be a major contribution to the removal of pollutants in our air. However, has anyone ever checked to see how much more electricity that we might need to support this huge increase for demand? I suppose some of the effects of that demand might be mitigated if everyone were to charge up their vehicles at night when the normal demand is lower. Still, that’s a lot of juice that needs to come from somewhere.

Let’s talk about the batteries needed for a bit. Batteries can be considered to be a hazardous material. If we have huge amounts of electric cars and hybrids that need to have significant battery capacity, what happens to these batteries when these cars start to be junked in huge quantities? We are going to need a complete new industry that deals with recycle of used automotive batteries. There are many problems with the normal lead-acid battery that are normally used in today’s vehicles. There are also problems with lithium-ion batteries that are being used in aviation applications. Perhaps the most promising approach would be to use fuel cells, which convert a fuel, such as hydrogen, into electricity. However, if we were to want to use massive amounts of fuel cells in our transportation system as it exists today, when we are going to need a huge source of hydrogen. How are we going to do that? It takes a huge amount of electricity to disassociate hydrogen from oxygen in water. Now we are back to the problem of how are we going to generate that much electricity? And we all remember what happened to the Hindenburg, right? Hydrogen is a very explosive gas.

The problem, ecologically speaking, with hybrids is that they indeed reduce the amount of gasoline consumed, and therefore reduce emissions. However, hybrids also introduce the same problem with batteries that was not present with purely gasoline-powered vehicles. These batteries need to be produced, and produced in an environmentally friendly as method as possible, and a way must be devised to dispose of these batteries in a similar manner.

I am not arguing that our society should not use these types of vehicles. I am just saying that we should not let ourselves, once again, be deluded into thinking that we are doing the “right thing” by an industry who wants to sell you something. Let’s not just fix one big problem by introducing new problems. And, most certainly, let's not just pretend we are doing our part because we happen to drive one of these new vehicles and figure that everything else is just "someone else's problem."

Thursday, December 31, 2009

My end of the year list: Bad Advertising!

Everyone seems to make a list at the end of the year. I would guess it is now part of those internet traditions that everyone is aware of. Books, movies, bad celebrity dresses, stupid quotes, etc. So, in keeping with this tradition, here is my list of deceitful, manipulative, stupid or annoying television commercials that I hope to never see again in 2010.

1. Capital One Credit Cards: This series of commercials have to be one of the weirdest ways to promote a credit card whose fine print is no doubt littered with landmines that will increase your loan rate at the drop of a hat. Visigoths ransacking villages, a dumbass in front of a computer whose dog is much more intelligent than he is and survivors of an airplane crash who are stuck on an island trying to get off are the spokesmen and women for Capital One. But the big selling point for this particular credit card is you can put your own picture on your card! Absolutely fu*king amazing! Let’s order a couple and one for little Sally as well, even though she is only six years old! What a STUPID selling point. Anyone who actually orders one of these credit cards on the basis of being able to put your picture on it deserves whatever happens to them.

2. Free Credit Reports Dot Com: This one has been in the news a lot, so this isn’t going to be much of a surprise. But advertising something “free” if you buy their service and is something that you can get free anyway from another source anyway is not really “free” in my mind. That’s like telling someone that they can get a free car jack, as long as they buy this car. No, that’s not even a good analogy, because to be a true analogy, you would need to be able to get a car jack for free somewhere. This is a commercial put together by lying SOB’s that do not care they are lying. “Free”, my ass.

3. The Big Head “Burger King”: These commercials, to their credit, are not deceitful. They are just weird and creepy. In these commercials, Burger King comes off as some sort of creepy stalker guy who never says anything. He’s just there. The ad agency behind these ads obviously figured that the Jack In The Box commercials are such a big hit that they would make their own! The only problem is, they failed miserably.

4. Ads for health insurance companies: Now, these aren’t all for the same company. This one is more of a category or genre. All these commercials are trying to accomplish is to make you feel all warm and cuddly about your insurance provider who is STILL going to find any reason they possibly can to drop your coverage if you get really sick and need it. One commercial that comes to mind actually doesn’t even really mention insurance. It’s just some kid talking about her mom who donates her piano, which she had as a kid and really loves, to a school or some other kind of organization that really needs it. Heartwarming. *Sigh* How nice… The problems are, of course, this has absolutely NOTHING to do with health insurance and it never addresses the fact that the CEO of this company will probably make about 85 mil this year while dropping coverage for anyone who might come down with a cold.

5. Verizon “Maps”: These commercials are annoying on their own. I especially disliked the one with Santa and his reindeer, which mercifully is not shown anymore since Christmas is over. But the point here that I haven’t seen anyone make is the colors of the maps. Verizon’s is red, and boy, it covers almost the entire U.S.A. A.T.&T’s map, on the other hand, is blue and barely covers anything. Yeah, this is deceitful on its own merits, since they are implying that ALL cell phone coverage provided by each company is what is shown, not just the 4G variety. But red vs. blue? That’s an interesting choice, especially when you look at the politics behind Verizon. I wonder what target audience these commercials are aimed at?

6. Jewelry commercials: This again is more of a category than a specific series of ads, because all the big jewelry chains do this. I wrote about this one before Christmas. But it’s not just Christmas. Valentine’s Day is also a biggie. I’ll just repeat what I said before.

The Christmas ads that really burn me are the ones for jewelry. I really dislike ostentatious displays anyway, and big, fat diamonds are about the best way to show that. Talk about a totally worthless expenditure of money to support an industry that has a corner on the market. That aside, I am really annoyed by the implication that buying someone a really bright, shiny bauble is the ultimate in romance. All these people in these commercials are young and beautiful, and they act like they came out of a romance novel. Tell me, what guy in his right mind would go out in the middle of the forest and wrap a living tree in lights, just so he can spring a diamond necklace on his girlfriend? And that assumes that he has a REALLY long extension cord or lugged a car battery out there as well. I think that these ads are really targeting the lazy bum who really isn’t normally too keen on keeping his wife’s or girlfriend’s feelings close to his heart and sees that buying jewelry would be a nice, easy (albeit expensive) way to immediately get back in his wife’s or girlfriend’s good graces. The women in these commercials always, without fail, are just awestruck and have this look on their faces that they would do absolutely anything for this guy who just bought her this piece of junk.


7. Geico Insurance: I admit I kind of liked the caveman commercials and the ones with the gecko are tolerable. But the ones with the stack of money with googlie eyes are weird and don’t even make a lot of sense.

8. Mixed message ads: This, again, is a category. It seems very trendy now to have commercials that are about two things at once. Sometimes, tie-ins are evident, such as toys of the latest Disney movie at McDonalds. But sometimes, there doesn’t even have to be an obvious tie-in. They are just trying to ride the latest wave of popularity. One playing now is about a bunch of guys eating a Big Mac that has something to do with James Cameron’s latest film, Avatar. I just do not get that one.

9. Miracle Whip “We will not tone it down!”: I won’t say much about this. Just watch it. Miracle Whip, the ultimate in rebellion!

You have any nominations? I may promote good suggestions from any comments received into this post itself. Boy, won't that be a thrill for YOU.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Here’s my annual “bah, humbug” post.


Oh, don’t get me wrong. I am not bashing the Christmas holiday itself. I am what you might call a “non-believer”, but I really have no problem with celebrating what is supposed to be a purely Christian holiday. I have said before that if I were a Christian, I would probably be a tad annoyed at what the holiday has become as well. And that is what I am really annoyed about.

Pressure. That is really what this holiday has become. There’s pressure to find the perfect gift, to bake the perfect pie and cookies, to have the perfect Christmas with your perfect family. Why? Because corporate America wants to sell you stuff. And not just ANY stuff. A lot of stuff and most of it expensive.

I remember when Christmas commercials were a lot about kids toys and maybe a commercial for an electric razor thrown in for good measure. (“Even our name says Merry Christmas!”)

What are the predominant Christmas commericials these days? From what I see, they are for luxury automobiles and a lot of very fancy and expensive looking jewelry. How many people really go out and buy luxury cars for themselves and their spouses at Christmas? And this is at a time when it is estimated that one in 8 kids in America is getting support from food stamps. Where unemployment is running in the double digits. Luxury cars for Christmas? I guess the well off will buy their gifts no matter what else is going on around them, and that this advertising is aimed at them. People without jobs or getting assistance from food stamps aren’t going to have much purchasing power, so the advertisers seem to have acknowledged that fact and just about abandoned the lower and part of the middle class altogether.

The Christmas ads that really burn me are the ones for jewelry. I really dislike ostentatious displays anyway, and big, fat diamonds are about the best way to show that. Talk about a totally worthless expenditure of money to support an industry that has a corner on the market. That aside, I am really annoyed by the implication that buying someone a really bright, shiney bauble is the ultimate in romance. All these people in these commercials are young and beautiful, and they act like they came out of a romance novel. Tell me, what guy in his right mind would go out in the middle of the forest and wrap a living tree in lights, just so he can spring a diamond necklace on his girlfriend? And that assumes that he has a REALLY long extension cord or lugged a car battery out there as well. I think that these ads are really targeting the lazy bum who really isn’t normally too keen on keeping his wife’s or girlfriend’s feelings close to his heart and sees that buying jewelry would be a nice, easy (albeit expensive) way to immeidiately get back in his wife’s or girlfriend’s good graces. The women in these commercials always, without fail, are just awestruck and have this look on their faces that they would do absolutely anything for this guy who just bought her this piece of junk.

My favorite holiday, I think, is Thanksgiving. It hasn’t been completely taken over by crass commercialism. This is mostly because there aren’t any gifts involved. If there were, you can bet that Corporate America would immedialely jump in there. Christmas should be like Thanksgiving, with maybe a few gifts but witbout any pressure. Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Emphasize the “merry” and “little.” Celebrate family. And your religion, if that is part of it for you. But do not pressure yourself into living up to some ridiculous ideal concocted by Madison Avenue to sell you an every increasing array of very expensive crap that you probably can’t afford.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Subaru gets an environmental “F minus” on their new television ad.


I really don’t know what to make of the new Subaru commercial. You may have seen it. Some guy is lovingly “retiring” his old Forrester by parking it under some remote tree, with a few other junked cars, so that his Forrester can “live on.” How heartwarming…

My question to Subaru is, what the hell is up with this? These days, isn’t it the “done” thing in commercials to show everyone how “green” your product is? Even if your product isn’t “green” in any sense of the word, companies are still trying to convince the general public that it is, seeing as that is where the new public sensibilities seem to lie. But this new Subaru commercial is advocating that you NOT dispose of your used car in an environmentally sound way. You should to just go find some tree out in the middle of nowhere where you can just park it, in case someone, somewhere is too cheap to go to the dealer and get some new car parts.

I got news for Subaru. Disposing of your junked cars like that seems to be a requirement in places like Montana (you don’t believe me, take a ride on the Amtrak Empire Builder and see how many yards along the tracks have junked cars stored there). But this is not the environmentally sound approach, and I think Subaru should be ashamed for even suggesting that this might be a good thing to do. We need people who are MORE environmentally aware, not less. We have enough of those clods already.

I don’t care how much you loved your old car. You do not just go take it out somewhere and park it under a tree when it dies or when you get tired of paying the mounting repair bills on it. Donate it to some charitable organization that takes used cars (running or not) and somehow makes money off of them for their charity. You are doing somebody a favor and you are not out there trashing the environment with what will eventually become a rusty pile of useless metal, plastic and rubber.

Picture from here.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

The messages I am receiving from advertising on television.


I haven’t picked on television commercials for a while. That was somewhat of a staple of this blog when I first started. It’s an easy target, and I get so annoyed at the basic message being sent out. So, maybe to try to get back into doing something other than politics, I’ll give it a bit of a go here.

These are things that I have learned about our society from watching television commercials. Based on the regularity with which I am subjected to these nuggets of American Culture, I suppose these points are vitally important. I figured that I better write them all down before I forget them all. Then where would I be?

- When a person is drinking coffee, they must grasp the cup firmly with BOTH hands, tilt their head back with their eyes closed, and take a deep breath and sigh contentedly. I assume that this is a method of clearing clogged sinuses. When a person is drinking coffee with friends (usually three total), not only must everyone hold their cups firmly with both hands, they also must all hold the cups very close to their faces and all three must have their heads very close to each other. A group sinus clearing, I suppose.

- Many of the same things that apply to drinking coffee also apply to eating soup. When eating soup with friends or family, no one is allowed to set their bowl of soup on a table. No, the proper way to eat soup, apparently, is again to hold the bowl very close to one’s mouth (most soup eaters are excessively messy, as everyone knows) and keep their heads very close together. And everyone must smile a lot. That is a by-product of the large amounts of MSG consumed, I believe.

- If you are a male that has, shall we say, “performance issues”, there are several things you must do. The first is that you should be very proud of this and the fact you are relying on some pharmaceutical assist, so much so that you should get together with your over-50 buddies that play in your rock and roll garage band and play and sing songs about your drug-enhanced experience to the tune of old Elvis Presley songs, which may or may not be in the public domain. You should also schedule a vacation with your wife or girlfriend to a vacation resort that will let you move two “his and hers” bathtubs out on the beach, so both of you can sit out on the beach, in bathtubs, while watching the sun go down. Where the water comes from to fill these bathtubs out on the beach is unknown, as there may be no obvious source. It may be that you don’t really need water and you and your wife/significant other can just sit around in dry, empty bathtubs in your undies. And finally, if your “exuberance” lasts for more than four hours, you need to go find a doctor to schedule immediate emergency surgery.

- In order to buy really cool tires for your all-terrain vehicle (which probably doesn’t ever get more “off-road” than the local Food Mart parking lot) or hopped up muscle car, you must be really young, good looking and have rock and roll music blasting at full volume. Buying the right tires is obviously the most important, coolest thing any young person can ever do. It will get you dates with really hot chicks that have a thing for tires equipped with all-weather treads. Or it may be this is just some sort of very obscure metaphor for something else entirely. But, big tires obviously matter!

- Everyone, no matter his or her station in life, must have a broker or financial consultant. If you don’t have one, you desperately need to find one. If you already have one, you must be very dissatisfied with him. If you don’t have one and aren’t looking for one, then you must be a person who handles his or her investments without such such aid on the web, or with minimal help from consultants who are available to assist you 24 hours a day but otherwise let you do whatever you damned well please but won’t ever let you lose money, ever. You must spend a lot of time on this activity, and must never be satisfied, ever. If you don’t have large amounts of money in stocks, mutual funds, foreign currencies or other such investments, there is something seriously wrong with you and you will probably die penniless and alone, without anyone to take care of you.

- The smaller something is that you are eating, the more important it is to grab it with both hands and hide the fact exactly how small it actually might be. You don’t want people to see your really tiny chicken sandwich and start laughing at you.

- Speaking of which, it is always acceptable to demean and ridicule someone based on the fast food they are eating at lunch. Cheeseburgers and fries are very laughable items. Original recipe chicken strips are MUCH more honest, believable and grown-up.

- Drinking too much beer causes hallucinations, such as large horses playing football, talking Dalmatians and beautiful young women who desire to rip the clothes off any male found drinking, in large quantities, the correct brand of beer.

- And finally, only elitist rich a**holes drive Cadillacs, so you better go buy one right now so you can be an elitist rich a**hole too!!

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

NCAA basketball tournament promotional genius.

This is one of the best promotions I have ever heard of. Per the Seattle Times:

Knowing the pull of the NCAA tournament for workers who would like to stay home and see it on TV, the Oregon Urology Institute has set aside 24 appointments for March 19 and 26 for men scheduling vasectomies. KSCR, a sports-radio station advertising the promotion, is throwing in a "recovery kit" — a bag of frozen peas, sports magazines and free pizza delivery.

A bag of frozen peas! Hell, yeah! That’s even better than pizza.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Today is Super Bowl Party Day, which epitomizes the worst excesses about our society.


I know that sports are very important to some people. Heck, I like sports. I held season tickets to the local university’s basketball team until the Athletic Department decided they would try extortion on their most loyal season ticket holders and donors. But, the Super Bowl… I actually hate it. I hardly ever watch it. I like NFL football, especially when the Seahawks are doing well. The playoffs are cool. But the Super Bowl seems to dwell in another universe from that of the regular season.

What other event generates dedicated multi-million dollar television commercials? A halftime event that gets a build up worthy of the Academy Awards show? Results in the most parties, mostly fueled by alcohol, across the country on a non-holiday? Everything is Super Duper. Must outdo last year! The event of the season! And this isn’t even saying anything about the game itself.

This whole display reeks of extravagance, over-hype, overindulgence, and billions of dollars poured into an event with a captive audience in the hope of moving billions more dollars from one place to another. It is the American psyche on display. And, in my mind, it isn’t pretty.

I also find it very insulting that very, very little will be said today, and has been said this week, about the continuing Iraq war, the outlandish and criminal behavior of the Bush Administration, and the huge problems facing us such as the coming energy crisis, the continual eroding of the infrastructure on which this country depends and the slow baking of our only habitable planet.

Let’s see if someone’s boob ends up on national TV today. Then we can really have a scandal we can talk about.

UPDATE: O.K., I admit that was one of the more exciting finishes to a Super Bowl in quite some time. Whoo!! First time I remember rooting for a team from New York, too.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

An example of corporate fascism; how Bill O’Reilly made JetBlue become a foot soldier in his war against “liberals”



One more day, one more outrage. I’ll try to keep the background info short. The DailyKos web site has been, for the last two years, organizing a yearly convention where liberals and Democrats of all persuasions get together and listen to speakers, famous and otherwise, and have open discussions. It sounds fascinating. I read many great things about the one last year in Vegas, I believe it was. I was very envious I wasn’t there. This year’s YearlyKos in is Chicago.

This year, Markos lined up some corporate sponsorship. JetBlue was one. They weren’t doing much, other than had an advertisement on the DailyKos web page, and were offering a couple of free tickets to the event. Well, the right wing nutjobs went crazy, Bill O’Reilly and Michelle Malkin among them. O’Reilly was on his radio program, calling the DailyKos web site “just the same as the Nazis” and pounded on the theme that JetBlue was essentially sponsoring Nazis. He kept repeating this, over and over. Initially, JetBlue was going, “What are you talking about? This is a good business opportunity, liberals take airplanes as well, and we are just trying to get out name out there.” Now, they have totally caved in and removed all contacts with the DailyKos.

Here’s a link to a story in Americablog that will give you more background, if you need it.

Once again, we are treated to the spectacle of these right wing a**holes with a loud mouth, a megaphone and a soapbox upon which to stand accusing the left of something that they are themselves, here and now, actively engaged in. The DailyKos same as a Nazi website? You have got to be kidding me. It is mostly dedicated to promoting and electing Democratic candidates for local and national offices, and, along with others like Firedoglake, is doing groundbreaking work in getting donations for political candidates they are pushing. I find quite a lot of the articles at DailyKos rather boring, lots of statistics about how much money was raised and what the breakdown of this or that is. Yes, there are some very hard-hitting anti-Bush and anti-wingnut articles. But Nazis? Please.

What I see is that O’Reilly and Malkin are doing the exact same thing that they are accusing the left of doing. They are out and out vilifying their enemies, threatening multi-million dollar corporations with “bad publicity”, villains by association, unless they conform to the wishes of these dangerous lunatics. How are these people being allowed to get away with stuff like this on national radio and TV? Why does no one, except the liberal blogs and publications, call these creeps on their unacceptable behavior? Who are these people? This is outrageous behavior by public figures.

I am wondering how long it will be before O’Reilly, Shawn Hannity, Michelle Malkin, Ann Coulter and all the rest of these crazy people who make money for their media conglomerates start calling for their followers to start painting a big “L” on the houses of liberals, or smashing in the windows of businesses run by or catering to liberals. Because, in truth, the only people acting like Nazis right now are the aforementioned conservatives nutcases.

Photo from Wikipedia, re. Kristallnacht

Monday, July 09, 2007

Vacuous thoughts on watching television.

I rarely watch network television, and I don’t have HBO or Showtime, so I have missed (but yet not missed) hits that “has everyone talking”, such as The Sopranos, Six Feet Under, etc. I mostly watch news (which is pretty much limited to KO on Countdown), some sports (a lot more when college basketball season starts), lots of movies (thank the Lord for Turner Classic Movies!), and various odds and ends on the Science Channel, the Times Discovery Channel, the History International Channel, and the Biography Channel (great stuff to be found on these, although they have WAY too many reruns for my taste). The only time I dip into all the other fare available is when I go on a business trip. During my last one, where I didn’t have a rental car and was pretty much stranded at my hotel the entire time, I came away with the following questions.

- When did TNT become the all Law and Order channel? Yes, they also show Charmed and Without A Trace, but only as “sandwich bread” to L&O’s canned pastrami. Exhibit A, 16 straight hours of L&O on the 4th of July. (And also, every time I see Fred Thompson, I get the shudders when I think this guy has an outside chance of becoming our next president!)

- TNT does have a nice weekly show in The Closer, but Kyra Sedgewick is really starting to grate on my nerves. Her shtick was kinda cute to begin with, but now I want to reach through the screen and slap her. Go see an analyst, for heaven’s sake! Jeez!

- Who decided it was acceptable to run advertisements for the network’s other shows DURING a different program? And they aren’t subtle at all. These ads take up the entire third of the screen, are full of zoom-in, zoom-out motion, and are accompanied by video game sound effects! Hey, we’re watching a show here! I guess they figured they should do that just because they can. To me, that is beyond annoying. It’s a major reason to stop watching that particular network, if I watched it in the first place.

- I think someone should take Billy Mays out behind the woodshed and beat him senseless with an ax handle. This is they guy, if you don’t know, that does all those commercials for crap that you “cannot buy in stores”. Dust mops, car wax crap, Orange Glow cleaner, Zorbees cleaning rags and several others. How does someone get a gig like that in the first place? And how can anyone talk in a monotone low shout all the friggin’ time?

- Is the new advertising paradigm to have commercials that are for two different things, simultaneously? I have noticed several of late. One is for GMC cars and trucks, and the new Transformers movie. I suppose GMC paid the movie company a ton of cash for product placement rights, but really, what is the commercial for? Are we supposed to go out and buy a Chevy truck? Or go see a movie? It’s confusing to us that don’t multiplex very well.

- What is up with the new advertising campaign for Shell Oil? I see some guy looking thoughtful at a kid drinking the last dregs of a milkshake, and the captions announce that this guy “has a problem”. Or maybe that is in a different commercial. I think I have seen three variants on this commercial, one of which introduces the actors who play the people on the commercial! And I have yet to figure out just what the heck the commercials are about anyway! Aren’t commercials like that supposed to convince me that Shell is doing a great job on something or other, or make me feel all warm and fuzzy when I buy their products? I have yet to figure out what this is all about, and the series has been on for at least three months. You would think that they would have moved to the next step by now. After all, those “Taster’s Choice” commercials finally got those two people together.

- I see ESPN is really scrounging for programming. That’s what happens when you have about five channels (ESPN, ESPN2, ESPNU, ESPN Classics, ESPN News) to fill. So, I initially laughed when they started showing poker. Who wants to see people playing cards? But that apparently caught on big. Just another high stakes reality game when the view can see people either strike it rich, or be humiliated on national TV. But now, they have moved to “competitive eating”. Excuse me, but.... WHAT? Competitive eating? As a spectator sport!?! On national TV? You gotta be kidding me.

I am beginning to think that there are WAY too many channels on television these days. There certainly needs to be a lot less 24-hour news channels, where minutia can become a national obsession at the drop of a hat.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

More television advertising that really annoys me.

One very prevalent television commercial these days normally seen during football games (and probably NASCAR races which I never, ever watch) is for KFC “Famous Bowls”. Excuse me? So, you can just declare yourself to be “famous” these days? I suppose if Paris Hilton can do it, that opens the field to pretty much anyone or anything, even if it happens to be a bowl full of cold lumpy starch with cheese. Actually, now that I think about it, those two things are somewhat similar….. Paris Hilton…. Bowl of mashed potatoes. Their talent for music is about the same, and they have about the same level of awareness of the universe outside of themselves. However, the big mound of mashed potatoes featured in CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND that Richard Dreyfuss prodded so lovingly with his fork could probably out-act Paris Hilton any day.

I already think it is rather laughable that KFC is now a supposedly meaningless acronym, instead of admitting that the “F” in KFC stands for “Fried”. Oh, no. Can’t admit to the truth, you know. I am also very tired of hearing the intro to “Sweet Home, Alabama” as their little “mind hook” into consumers. Playing to the Deep South NASCAR dads much?

I just think that anointing yourself or one of your products as “famous” immediately at the product introduction is a remarkable instance of over-hype. People are famous. Bill Clinton. Luther Vandross. Jerry Mathers as the Beaver. Those are famous people. Historical landmarks like the Washington Monument are famous. Mashed potatoes with some gravy and cheese on top are most definitely NOT famous.

They also never show how big these things are. Whenever you want to hide the true size of the product you are advertising, whether it is a bowl full of mash potatoes or a small pickup truck with a max-cab but a four foot long bed, never show the product in the same frame as something recognizable, like a human. Keep the size very vague and the potential customer will never know, until he/she actually BUYS one, that they are going to be overcharged by a factor of about three.

KFC also had a good advertising campaign a few of years ago for nine different “collectable” tubs of fried chicken featuring pictures of “famous” NASCAR drivers. Collectable? COLLECTABLE?! Cardboard containers with puddles of congealed chicken grease on the bottom are now “collectable”? Please…. If anyone actually tried to display their collection of these things, they would have every stray dog and raccoon in the neighborhood scratching at the basement door trying to get in.

“Famous” bowls…. Sheesh. Yeah, and I am a “famous” blogger.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Advertising and some unintended effects on society

I am not a psychologist or sociologist. I'm only an observer of society.

Advertising, in its’ current form on television, is all about shaping opinion and trying to influence decisions. Well, duh. But now that I have stated the first postulate of my advertising theorem, I can now develop it further.

Shaping opinions for advertisers is, of course, first and foremost about the product they are trying to sell you. But the ads also have a secondary, perhaps unintended, perhaps not, consequence. They influence your opinions about more than just the product. They influence your opinion about your self-image, about how you view your place in society, and about society itself. This can be rather dangerous to not only the individual, but to society as a whole.

Take the issue of instant gratification, for example. The mindset that car companies, credit card companies, etc., are trying to instill is that there isn’t any reason to wait to have what you want. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have the money for it. In fact, just by the fact that you own a credit card, you will be rolling in cash to buy all sorts of fabulous vacations and luxury items. Ultimately paying for these items doesn’t even come into the picture.

Everyone knows how dangerous this is for the individual. You can get neck deep in debt before you know it, charging all sorts of items that you don’t really need at 18% interest. But what is this doing to our society as a whole? Obviously, when you expand the personal debt issue to the entire population, you have a very large part of society that is deeply in debt and doesn’t really know how to extricate itself. But there is also this issue of instant gratification. This notion that everyone should have everything they want immediately, regardless of what this might mean in the future, is now instilled in our population as a given. And this isn’t only about buying things with cash vs. credit. It is about politics, about relations with other people, about your life as a whole. We now have, as a basic ideal of our society, the concept of not having to wait to get what you want. It’s wrong to wait or to try to actually earn what you want.

This is pretty dangerous for several reasons. The obvious one, again, is the personal debt issue that our country faces. That may very well come back to bite us in a big way in the near future, according to some economists that I have read. In a way, it is this debt that has been driving the economy of this country for a while. Buying stuff on credit means that the producers of all these goods upon which our economy depends get their money, can continue to exist and grow, and continue to make their product (whatever that might be). The economic institutions are happy, because of the high rates of interest they charge, INCLUDING penalty payments that are now a big part of their income. All this stimulation of the economy is done on the concept that people will be paying for all of this present economic good health sometime in the future. When, it doesn’t really matter to anyone but the person carrying the debt.

Sometime in the future, this entire pyramid scheme may start to collapse. Many of the people carrying these large debts for things they don’t really need (such as a Hummer, for instance) or things that they don’t even have anymore (such as a vacation) are not going to be able to keep up. House payments may start to be defaulted in a large way. The Bush administration has made it more difficult for individuals to declare personal bankruptcy, even though huge corporations use Chapter 11 as a business strategy.

What is going to happen to the economy when huge amounts of adjustable rate mortgages are defaulted? The people who default on these loans are not going to have a place to live anymore, of course. They are going to have their personal credit rating trashed, and that might just the least of their worries. Additionally, the sudden glut of available housing on the market might just cause the bubble to pop, and housing and the financing of said housing has been one of the major drivers of our economy for some time now.

I realize it is probably a stretch to start out talking about instant gratification and making the jump to buying a house you cannot afford in more traditional ways. However, I think this is a valid point. It is a matter of the person in question having talked themselves into buying a house with perhaps methods that allow them to buy the house right now (thus, the “instant gratification” part of the equation) that may not work for them five or six years in the future. That is not part of their equation. Yes, there are good reasons for wanting to buy a house, and the conventional wisdom is that you buy the most house you can afford. You are banking on the assumption that the market value of the real estate will increase over the years, as well as your salary. Therefore, although you may be really pushing the envelope during the early years, it will smooth out and you will be much better off financially for it in the future.

That’s the way it is supposed to work, and still can, given the correct circumstances. But when you start throwing in adjustable rate mortgages, balloon payments, and even interest only loans into the equation, the whole concept has been altered. The system is now “gamed” to benefit the housing industry and the loan industry, not the consumer. That is the part of the instant gratification idea that plays into this. The consumer has now been talked into an action that looks good at the outset, but if not handled correctly, could have disastrous consequences in the future. And when you multiply that disastrous consequence across millions of consumers simultaneously, you have the makings of a large, negative impact on the economy of this country.

Even worse than getting sucked down by debt on something that people really do need, such as housing, is the notion of getting sucked down by something entirely frivolous that they don’t need. High-end automobiles are an obvious example of this. People don’t really need Hummers or SUV’s that cost in excess of thirty thousand dollars. They only think they do. Very bad reasons include need it for their self-esteem, or to impress their friends and neighbors. Driving something very intimidating that could actually crush the car in front of you can empower a person. It gives them a feeling of dominance that they might not have in their real life. Advertising feeds into this need. There is a current ad about a guy who is buying tofu at the grocery store, and he looks at the purchases of the guy in front of him in line, which include beer and a huge slab of raw red beef. The tofu guy immediately goes out and buys a Hummer. We see him with a very self-satisfied look on his face as the ad ends. What concept is this ad reinforcing? You are a wimp unless you have one of these babies.

If this is the basic message that the auto manufacturer has to depend on for sales, then their product is not one that indispensable for the consumer to have. Rather, it is purely a discretionary purchase. There is no “need” involved. And ultimately, this is a very, very poor reason to go into debt that you ultimately cannot afford. This is not to say that luxury items, strictly for the indulgence of the consuming public, are necessarily bad things. In fact, many times, high-end items like these can really add to one’s life, if one can afford them. Again, that is the instant gratification speaking. People should not look upon these items as a means to get to a fulfilled life. They should only be looked upon as a nice addition; icing to the cake you already have. But our society views these items now as necessities, regardless of whether or not they are affordable.

The concept of instant gratification is, of course, well known and most everyone understands that it can be ultimately destructive. But the insidious aspect is now that advertising as helped establish this belief system firmly in our national psyche. And that is dangerous for us all.

There may be more on this later.

Friday, July 21, 2006

USAirways to sell advertising space on barf bags.

I suppose that if one of the purposes of this blog is to make fun and/or dissect the intent behind advertising, I should really take this on. It isn't much fun, though, as the joke has already pretty much written itself. I don't suppose USAirways is fooling themselves into thinking that people are really going to be comprehending an ad for, say, Pepto-Bismol, while puking their guts out, probably due to being bounced around the sky in some severe turbulence. That just wouldn’t happen for me. I don’t suppose these folks who devise and pay for advertising campaigns are that stupid. So, I suppose the alternative is that they hope that people will come across them while digging around in the seat back pocket in front of them while, I dunno, not looking at the safety briefing card that the flight attendant you are ignoring is holding up while you are looking at the box scores in the newspaper.

I just am not sure I see the connection between the ad and the viewer, in this case. With TV ads, they pretty much have a captive audience, unless said audience goes out to the kitchen to get a Bud Lite and a ham sandwich during the commercial break. Maybe they are banking on the complete and utter boredom that often sinks in with long flights, people will start rummaging around in the frantic hope they will find something to occupy their attention for a few minutes of the four and a half hour flight, stuck inside a large flying aluminum tube crowded with all sorts of people you don’t know and probably don’t wish to.

I am not sure I have seen such a weird ad campaign since the “Just Say No To Drugs!” slogan printed on the rubber mats inside urinals in men’s restrooms. (What, women don’t do drugs?) Yes, I could see how seeing that message, staring up at you while you have your willie in your hand, all strung out with your drug-of-choice, would really have an affect on your life. “Of course! Why didn’t I think of that!?! Just say No!”

Anyway, it will be an interesting experiment to see how long this proposed vehicle for advertising will work. Why do companies pay for this stupid stuff, anyway? I guess they are so desperate to saturate (Hmmm, unintentional pun there) the potential customer with their particular brand name, they don’t really care what in what form that ad comes in.

Some companies have more money than they really need, if they decide to spend it on stupid stuff like this.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Car commercials, self-image, and the suspension of the laws of physics

Car commercials really interest me, in an academic sense. As I have said before, I like to really watch commercials not for what they are trying to sell us, but for the message that they are trying to get across. Of course, most modern television advertising in the first place is not about the product itself. It is about a feeling, a state of mind, a concept. Anyone who doubts that this works only need walk into a Starbucks. All it takes is a state of mind and some granite table tops to sell a four dollar cup of coffee.

This approach seems to be used quite a lot on several products at the opposite end of the cost/durability index; razors and automobiles. I’ve spoken earlier about how advertisers try to get young males to buy their products by making them into sleek racing machines, into a “complete system”. Of course, there are women thrown in for good measure. Automobiles advertisers really need to make use of this approach because of the expense and longevity of the product they are selling. They have to pull out all the stops to get you to believe that you are special, someone worthy of everyone’s attention (including the women) in the entire world.

How they try to convince you of this is becoming more and more surreal. High priced cars are now somehow able to slow down time. The world literally stops dead in its’ tracks when you drive by in the brand new 200X (insert automobile name here). Every single person within viewing distance is captivated while you drive by with a knowing, smug half-smile on your face. These fancy machines have the ability to mesmerize all who see it. The results are a population of zombies who live on a different time scale than everyone else when you drive by.

Another favorite trick is the inherent coupling of this particular automobile and an exciting, dynamic lifestyle, usually associated with the rugged wilderness of the western United States. How many automobiles currently are or have been named for a place in the west? Tacoma, Tuscon, Montana, Durango.... (Personally, I am waiting to see an SUV or truck named the Bakersfield. I think that would be a winner.) If you own one of these conveyances, you will be transported to far off realms of intense beauty and solitude. You will become adept at white water kayaking, mountain biking, and rock climbing, even if the only reason you get off your couch on the weekends is to go down to the convenience store for another six pack before the big game comes on TV. These machines are capable of actually transforming you into a dynamic and interesting person that you somehow believe has really inside you all the time, and only needs a little impetus to come springing out.

The intent of this, as it goes without saying, is to convince you that YOU will also be worthy of the attention of the star-struck when you drive one of these machines. You will be unique, elevated to star status equal that of any movie star. (I find this point pretty ironic, because nothing would make these companies happier than to have every single person in the United States have one of these. Or two. How you can be unique and different when every single one of your neighbors is also as unique and different as you are rather defies explanation. And Webster’s.) You will become special and worthy of everyone’s attention, admiration, and yes, envy. Everyone will be envious of you. You, Bill Patterson of Topeka, Kansas, who works as a bank teller and who only leaves the city to go visit your mother in Kansas City every few weeks. If you buy one of these, you are no longer the dull boring person that no one pays attention to, except when your mother nags at you about getting married. You will be a brand new person who can command everyone’s attention, who controls the laws of physics just by the act of driving through the neighborhood.

When you really stop and break down the message commercials are trying to get across, I think they are very, very insulting and condescending. I suppose the fact that these commercials work says something about the gullibility and self-image of the television watching population in this country, as well as the absolute power of repeated and pervasive suggestion on a person’s psyche.