Sunday, January 23, 2011

Several reasons why American citizens should be allowed to carry guns anywhere they want to.


- If you are at your son's high school basketball game and the ref makes a terrible call, you can threaten to shoot him.

- If you are driving on the freeway and someone cuts you off, you can threaten to shoot him.

- If you come across an actual crime in progress, you can shoot the criminals or anyone else who is standing around that also has a gun out and looks like he might be a criminal. (Of course, there is absolutely zero chance that the police, when they happen upon the scene, or even another citizen armed to the teeth, that they would shoot you because, to them, you look like you might be a criminal.)

- At political events, if someone says something or displays a sign that you disagree with, you can threaten to shoot him.

- If you are at a bar and getting pretty sloshed while watching your favorite football team, you can threaten to shoot anyone who is cheers when the other team scores a touchdown.

- If you are coming back to your parked car and you see someone putting a flyer underneath the windshield wipers but you think he might actually be trying to steal your car, you can threaten to shoot him.

- If you are protesting at a Family Planning clinic, you can threaten to shoot anyone who works there or looks like they might even be thinking about going in the door.

Kansas, Texas, Oklahoma and Arizona must have really by idyllic places to live in the 1880's, you know, because everyone had a gun and that made everyone extremely safe. Those shootouts in bars and the streets must have really been entertaining. It's really too bad that we don't allow those anymore.

No comments: